Fictional Trump disclosure speech (meme)

We might as well have some fun on this sub, right?

Title: President Donald J. Trump Disclosure on Extraterrestrial Contact

Location: White House Press Room

Date: June 6, 2024

Donald Trump:

“Thank you, thank you. It’s great to see everyone here today. Very important announcement, folks, very important. Believe me, you’re gonna wanna hear this.

So, everyone knows David Grusch, right? He’s been in the news, talking about some big stuff, really big stuff. And I have to tell you, folks, everything he said is true. Everything. For the past 75 years, since 1947, the United States government has been in contact with extraterrestrials. Can you believe it? Extraterrestrials! Aliens, folks, not the kind that cross the border, but from way out there.

These beings, they have unknown intentions. We don’t know what they want, but we’ve been talking to them, and it’s been covered up, covered up big time. The Pentagon, the CIA, all these agencies, they’ve been keeping it a secret. And not just keeping it a secret, folks, they’ve been doing very bad things to keep it a secret. People have been murdered. Yes, murdered. This is a scandal bigger than Watergate, bigger than anything you’ve ever seen.

Now, Congress, they’re stepping up, doing a massive investigation, the biggest you’ve ever seen. They’re looking into the military, the private defense contractors, all these people, to see if this data is 100% factual. And if it is, and I believe it is, we’re going to prosecute members of the military-industrial complex with crimes against humanity. Crimes against humanity, folks. This is huge.

I want to be clear about something else, too. I’m not suicidal, never had mental health issues in my life, believe me. If something happens to me, if someone decides to push me under a bus or something like that, every person and every agency housing non-human intelligence vehicles and biologics will be exposed. Completely exposed.

We need transparency, folks. The American people deserve to know the truth. It’s time for the lies to end. We’re gonna drain the swamp, and we’re gonna reveal everything. Thank you, and God bless America.”

[End of Speech]

Note: This is a fictional script and not a real statement made by Donald Trump.