I miss when I could dismiss the whole thing as being an adolescent fantasy

Nowadays my time outside of work is spent reading everything I can and watching all the latest happenings on the whole uap thing. I was totally uninterested in UFOs from my early 20s all the way up till really recently, and I was able to lead a mostly normal life and pursue other interests. When I was young I was kinda obsessed with UFOs, but I put all that aside when I discovered rave culture and psychedelics.

Recent developments have reawakened my obsession, and honestly I wish I could put it back to sleep or even kill it entirely. The loop from excitement at hearing some new revelation, to incredulity that it might be real and actually be proven finally, to the creeping dread that this shit might actually be real, oh fuck oh shit… it’s just ongoing and honestly pretty debilitating. It’s like an addiction where you feel yourself getting deeper and deeper into it but you feel helpless to stop yourself. I’ve reached a stage of life (early Fifties) where I’m actually okay with just living a boring, uneventful life for the two or three decades I have left to me.

Honestly I’d rather just ignore all this crap. But see, here’s the thing—I have a horrible feeling is not going to be possible to ignore this stuff for much longer. Which gets me back to reading about it and listening to podcasts and so on and the loop goes round again…

How’re y’all coping with trying to balance normal life with recent events?